'Studio' is a collection of what Father has spoke to me about values and other things in life through ballet lessons. I promised to jot it down for my own reminder and also to inspire others.
Last night, this little sharing came to mind, I was encouraged and I hope you too, will be encouraged... Be blessed!
*****
I remember this happened somewhere in September or October 2008. It had been a dreadful week for me.
I was quite sick, physically and mentally exhausted. It was the last few weeks of the semester. Assignments were piling up (not because I don’t want to deal with it, but I was quite sick).
Ballet exam was coming up in few weeks but my progress was rather slow.
Along with it, there were a few other responsibilities and tasks to handle too. Pioneering children worship team was one of it, tending to various concerns in my cells were part of it, aside from the conferences and all.
Sounds quiet thrilling, huh? But it was a challenging process.
That particular week, everything just went hay-wire and by the end of it, I was almost at the verge of giving up.
Instead of waking up on a typical Sunday morning with joyous anticipation, I snug under my blanket and declared a “strike” (mogok). Haha… sounds familiar?
But I got up anyway and dragged my feet to children church for set up. After morning service, I rushed to the dance studio for exam practice.
*****
When I arrived, the main studio was occupied by the younger girls and we, the adults had to cram in the small waiting room next door.
Miss Kathiy, told me to work on my pointe. Grrr… I hated this the most.
My legs were still hurt from the practice on Friday and here she was telling me to jump. I showed her a few times and she kept asking me to do it again. She wasn’t satisfied and told me to go next door to practice on my own. In my heart, I was fuming, thinking why can’t she get it? “I am not well and my legs are still painful…”
At that moment, I wanted to just walk out of the studio and go home. But I went next door. Sat down and prayed silently for strength and for Father to show me His will again.
I stood up and faced myself in the mirror. My hands were neatly positioned on the bar. I took a deep breath and skipped a few times.
But before you knew it, I fell on the floor as my legs were still too painful and weak to support. I sat there with tears flowing from my eyes.
“May be I should not have enrolled myself in the exam at the first place. May be ballet is not for me.” Voices of doubts…
Memories of how I ended up in this dance school came pouring like water. It didn’t happen by chance. I wiped my tears and said, “Father, I know You are here with me in this even from the very start. Grant me the courage and strength, Father. I can’t do this alone. I need You here with me.”
I picked myself up and slowly, I tried skipping. The pain didn’t go away, but it is less disturbing now.
*****
Miss Kathiy came in and told me to show her. I did. Even though it wasn’t perfect, but it was way better than before. She smiled and said, “good, Audrey. Keep it up.”
When the class ended, she came and sat next to me. She said a few things but one thing that I still remember till today was this…
“Audrey, you got to keep telling yourself that you can do it. I know there are so much for you to catch up with the rest of the class, but I saw something different in you and I believe you can do it.””But it is really tiring and painful. My knee is still in the process of healing.”
“You got to suffer. Pain is good, Audrey. Everyone has to suffer; there should not be any excuse.”
"But... it’s really….”
“Nothing is too hard unless you allow it too. All of the dancers, even me when through hard training.”
*****
When I was on my way back from the studio, somehow I felt relief. During my quiet time that night, I pondered on what happened today.
The scenario in the studio today is rather similar to what we all face in reality. Trials and testing are inevitable elements in life.
The Word says,
“consider it pure joy, my brothers, when ever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” – James 1:2-4
I thought how Jesus went through time of testing in the wilderness. He stood strong in His faith. He didn’t give in.
I thought about the different scenarios in life. Studies, career, relationship, marriage, skills, character, and such… They don’t just happen. Most of the time, it needs to be ‘worked on’, be ‘built’, be ‘nurtured’… etc.
There were times when things are hard. It was as if the whole world turned their back against us or we have failed ourselves and others. We feel like giving up.
But we have the assurance that Jesus will never leave us alone.
God’s love does not always keep us from trials, but it is a love that always keeps us through trials. His joy is our strength.
Hang on in there. There would not be a testimony without tests. And here is one of them.
Even in hardships, we rejoice because we have the assurance that all things work for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). Have faith! God bless!
Love,
aud
Last night, this little sharing came to mind, I was encouraged and I hope you too, will be encouraged... Be blessed!
*****
I remember this happened somewhere in September or October 2008. It had been a dreadful week for me.
I was quite sick, physically and mentally exhausted. It was the last few weeks of the semester. Assignments were piling up (not because I don’t want to deal with it, but I was quite sick).
Ballet exam was coming up in few weeks but my progress was rather slow.
Along with it, there were a few other responsibilities and tasks to handle too. Pioneering children worship team was one of it, tending to various concerns in my cells were part of it, aside from the conferences and all.
Sounds quiet thrilling, huh? But it was a challenging process.
That particular week, everything just went hay-wire and by the end of it, I was almost at the verge of giving up.
Instead of waking up on a typical Sunday morning with joyous anticipation, I snug under my blanket and declared a “strike” (mogok). Haha… sounds familiar?
But I got up anyway and dragged my feet to children church for set up. After morning service, I rushed to the dance studio for exam practice.
*****
When I arrived, the main studio was occupied by the younger girls and we, the adults had to cram in the small waiting room next door.
Miss Kathiy, told me to work on my pointe. Grrr… I hated this the most.
My legs were still hurt from the practice on Friday and here she was telling me to jump. I showed her a few times and she kept asking me to do it again. She wasn’t satisfied and told me to go next door to practice on my own. In my heart, I was fuming, thinking why can’t she get it? “I am not well and my legs are still painful…”
At that moment, I wanted to just walk out of the studio and go home. But I went next door. Sat down and prayed silently for strength and for Father to show me His will again.
I stood up and faced myself in the mirror. My hands were neatly positioned on the bar. I took a deep breath and skipped a few times.
But before you knew it, I fell on the floor as my legs were still too painful and weak to support. I sat there with tears flowing from my eyes.
“May be I should not have enrolled myself in the exam at the first place. May be ballet is not for me.” Voices of doubts…
Memories of how I ended up in this dance school came pouring like water. It didn’t happen by chance. I wiped my tears and said, “Father, I know You are here with me in this even from the very start. Grant me the courage and strength, Father. I can’t do this alone. I need You here with me.”
I picked myself up and slowly, I tried skipping. The pain didn’t go away, but it is less disturbing now.
*****
Miss Kathiy came in and told me to show her. I did. Even though it wasn’t perfect, but it was way better than before. She smiled and said, “good, Audrey. Keep it up.”
When the class ended, she came and sat next to me. She said a few things but one thing that I still remember till today was this…
“Audrey, you got to keep telling yourself that you can do it. I know there are so much for you to catch up with the rest of the class, but I saw something different in you and I believe you can do it.””But it is really tiring and painful. My knee is still in the process of healing.”
“You got to suffer. Pain is good, Audrey. Everyone has to suffer; there should not be any excuse.”
"But... it’s really….”
“Nothing is too hard unless you allow it too. All of the dancers, even me when through hard training.”
*****
When I was on my way back from the studio, somehow I felt relief. During my quiet time that night, I pondered on what happened today.
The scenario in the studio today is rather similar to what we all face in reality. Trials and testing are inevitable elements in life.
The Word says,
“consider it pure joy, my brothers, when ever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” – James 1:2-4
I thought how Jesus went through time of testing in the wilderness. He stood strong in His faith. He didn’t give in.
I thought about the different scenarios in life. Studies, career, relationship, marriage, skills, character, and such… They don’t just happen. Most of the time, it needs to be ‘worked on’, be ‘built’, be ‘nurtured’… etc.
There were times when things are hard. It was as if the whole world turned their back against us or we have failed ourselves and others. We feel like giving up.
But we have the assurance that Jesus will never leave us alone.
God’s love does not always keep us from trials, but it is a love that always keeps us through trials. His joy is our strength.
Hang on in there. There would not be a testimony without tests. And here is one of them.
Even in hardships, we rejoice because we have the assurance that all things work for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). Have faith! God bless!
Love,
aud
long queue but worth the wait le.. hehe
